Nag Less, Pray More

Category: Facing Fear (Page 5 of 5)

The Day My World Hit the Cement

This past Monday started out like any regular day, but I don’t think I’ll forget it for the rest of my life.  I woke up and began preparing for a full day when I received a text from my mother-in-law that she would be in town.   We only see her 6 or 7 times a year, so we wanted to make her visit a priority.  My husband had already made arrangements to take the day off work because we had more than the usual activities going on that day.  My daughter’s fiance’s parents were coming to town for lunch, to look at the wedding venue, and to scout out a place for the rehearsal dinner, and we were joining them.  In addition, my husband had a doctor appointment, a lawn care person coming to the house to help us rescue our lawn, and a late afternoon training run for his upcoming marathon.   I had my usual Monday schedule of walking 3.75 miles with the moms from my Mornings for Moms group at 8:30am and meeting with two friends for Bible Study at 10:30am.

It was a beautiful day for a walk through Bidwell Park’s lush foliage.  We had never seen so many butterflies in one morning.  My three friends and I were engaged in conversation about the joys and trials of family life. I tried to stay in the moment, but I was a bit on edge with our late start to our walk and the full afternoon awaiting me.  As we rounded the last corner before heading to our cars, I stumbled over a piece of bark, causing my ankle to give way and hurling me  toward the sidewalk face first.  I didn’t have time to react before hitting the ground with a sickening thud.   I pushed myself up to a sitting position and noticed the scrape on my sunglasses, the concerned looks on my friends’ faces, and the  blood dripping onto the cement from my mouth and chin.  I ran my tongue along my upper jaw and felt two teeth dangling precariously.  The pain throbbed throughout my body.

My friends sprung into motion as Carol called her dentist to see if we could rush me in, Tiffany gave me her baby wipes and prayed for me, and Lori bandaged my largest wounds.  Within minutes, I was in Carol’s Suburban heading to the dentist, stunned by how my day had derailed.   The next hour was spent in a dentist’s chair as the dentist and his assistant fought to save my teeth and stitched up a gaping hole inside my mouth.   My mind raced with thoughts of the effect this would have on my week and life.

I did not join my daughter’s future in-laws on the afternoon outing, but I did visit with my mother-in-law and her best friend.  I expressed my hope to be teaching again by Wednesday morning and have everything back to normal.  I awoke Tuesday with a groan as my body shouted in protest from head to toe.   My reflection frightened me with abrasions littering my face.   I knew it would be a long week.

Two days later, muscle relaxants are my friends.  I have not yet resumed my normal activities and am not sure when I will able to again.  Sleep is uncomfortable.   I have only left the house to go to Prompt Care and the chiropractor.  I still don’t look like myself.   Eating is difficult at best.

We never know what will occur in our lives from day to day.   We can’t emotionally budget for the unexpected, but we have to accept it as it comes.  When hard times come, we have to look for the lessons in them and how much worse it could be.

How was your life changed by unexpected circumstances this week?

 

 

Celebrating the Empty Nest

Almost everything I have read while anticipating and newly experiencing the empty nest defined it in negative terms. When Googling the empty nest, words surrounding it include syndrome, coping, grief, depression, loneliness, loss of purpose, worry, and stress.  It sounded horrible and something to be avoided at all costs.  I briefly debated between never allowing my children to leave and bracing myself for the onslaught of this dreaded affliction, but I knew I would be stifling my children if I didn’t allow them to experience the independence that they were designed to attain.  The fact that children have the confidence and knowledge to move beyond the four walls of their childhood home is a testament to our success as parents.

I have found the empty nest to be a time of joy, freedom, and celebration.  I am not lying awake, listening for the key in the front door in the wee hours of the morning.  The clutter and laundry only belongs to my husband and I.  When we get together with our children, it is because they want and choose to spend time with us.  We love hearing tales of their new adult lives, and we have new tales to tell them as well. We have the freedom to travel without much forethought about logistics surrounding the children.  We no longer have bathroom wars over anyone taking too long or leaving it in poor condition.  My husband and I enjoy each other and the extra space.

While we will always miss our children and treasure the memories of the years they were under our roof, it’s time to take an optimistic look at a job well done in raising our children to successfully fly away from the nest.

 

I Don’t Feel Old Enough

Tomorrow I am going to drive myself down to Winters to the childhood home of my daughter’s fiance, Joe, to spend the day with Joe’s mom for her birthday.  We plan to go out to lunch and try on dresses for our children’s wedding coming up in July.  After we finish our fun day together, I will drop her off then drive over to my daughter’s house to spend the night with her.  All of it sounds very wonderful, and I’m really looking forward to it.

Then what could be the problem?

Although my outward appearance proves otherwise, inside I barely feel old enough to be married, let alone old enough to have a daughter getting married.  I’m not one of those women who normally does the whole “lunch and shopping” kind of day, yet I know that this will bring Joe’s mom and I closer together and help us get ready for this wedding.  I am still surprised I am considered grown up enough to be out on my own, yet my 23-year old daughter is living in a different town, successfully navigating her way through her first year of teaching.  I still feel so young and uncertain inside, much like a young teenager.

But in a few short months, I will be celebrating my 50th birthday!  The wrinkles congregating in the corners of my eyes and my cracking knees testify to this fact.

I’m wondering when I will ever feel fully grown up in my heart of hearts.  When will I have the confidence to believe that I am really an adult?

Taking the Plunge

high dive

I’ve planned for and anticipated the launch of this blog for months.  Yet as is so often my way, I procrastinated and worried about how others would judge my writing.   I have determined that today is the day…no more fear, no more excuses!

I feel much like I did the summer after 5th grade as I climbed the many steps up the ladder to the high dive at our local swim club.  My knees shook as I edged towards the end of the board.  I arrived at my launching point and stared down at the water below.  I was faced with a choice.  I could turn around, retrace my steps, and experience failure or I could close my eyes and jump.  I could hear those in line behind me growing restless and impatient as I stood motionless.  Then, in an instant, I confidently hurled myself downward.  The momentary terror transformed into a thrilling confidence as successfully splashed into the cool water.  I’d completed what I’d set out to do, and nobody could take that accomplishment from me!

So now, as I stand at the edge of the blogosphere, knees shaking and heart racing, I hold my breath, plug my nose, and bellow, “3, 2, 1, go!” as I dive in.

 

 

Newer posts »